My Code — Born in Struggle, Forged in Integrity

Zac_Evolving
Apr 5
3 min read

Updated: Apr 6

A few weeks ago, I had the honor of spending time at the Struggle Well / Warrior PATHH training through the Boulder Crest Foundation. It was one of those rare experiences where time slows down, distractions fall away, and what’s essential rises to the surface.

One of the most powerful practices we engaged in was the creation of a personal code—a set of guiding principles that help define who we are and how we move through the world.

What came through for me was clear and grounded.

Authenticity. Integrity. Connection to Community.

These aren’t just nice-sounding words. They’re lifelines. Anchors. Truths I’ve earned the hard way.

Authenticity — Trusting My Inner Compass

For so much of my life, I lived under the influence of other people’s expectations. I looked outside myself for validation, approval, and even identity. And, as a result, I found myself stuck in the same repeating patterns—living someone else’s life instead of trusting my own.

But authenticity doesn’t come from reading the right book or saying the right thing. It comes from learning to trust your gut, even when it’s inconvenient. It comes from listening inward, honoring your truth, and living it—regardless of how it’s received.

I’m not on this path alone. I’m surrounded by a support team—family, brothers, mentors, community—who embody this. They remind me daily that to trust others fully, I first have to trust myself.

Integrity — No Cutting Corners

For the majority of my life, I struggled with this: one foot in, one foot out, always looking for the shortcut, the easier path, the fast result. But that mindset never led me to peace. It only kept me disconnected from my purpose.

What I’ve come to realize is this: when I trust myself, I don’t need to cut corners. I don’t need to rush. I don’t need to manipulate outcomes or skip steps. I can move forward in alignment—doing what I say I’ll do, even when no one’s watching.

To me, integrity is simple:

• Follow through.

• Honor your word.

• Stay committed to your path, especially when it’s hard.

It’s not about being perfect. It’s about being honest—and keeping that honesty intact when you’re alone.

Connection to Community — I Can’t Do This Alone

Without connection to community, I self-destruct. Period.

I’ve learned that isolation isn’t just lonely—it’s dangerous. When I disconnect from others, I lose perspective, rhythm, and myself. But when I’m in community, I have a place to bring my full self—no masks, no posturing, just presence.

Connection gives me access to shared wisdom, grounded support, and accountability. It reminds me that I’m not alone in this work. I can show up fully for others, and they can show up for me. That’s sacred.

I find this in the men of UNcivilized.

I build this through Evolving Guidance.

I live this in my family, my coaching, my partnerships.

This isn’t just a feel-good idea—it’s a survival skill.

Inspired by the Path

This code didn’t arrive out of nowhere—it’s been shaped by years of doing the work.

Books like The Four Agreements helped me break cycles and reclaim my word.

The teachings of José Luis Stevens, PhD, reminded me of the importance of living in alignment through the Four Pillars of Vitality:

True Work. True Study. True Play. True Rest.

And through Evolving Guidance and the UNcivilized Nation, I’ve had the space to live this code in real time—not just in theory, but in practice, service, and embodiment.

These resources helped bring language to what my soul already knew. This code simply brought it into form.

This Time Feels Different

This isn’t the first time I’ve worked with building a personal code—but this time, it feels different. It feels true. It feels concrete.

These elements didn’t come from striving or overthinking—they flowed out of me because I trusted.

This code is something I’ll continue building on. It’s a foundation that will eventually be woven into my personal ethos. And like anything meaningful, it will evolve. These codes aren’t set in stone—they’re living guides. They serve as a realignment when we’ve drifted, and a compass when we feel lost.

What’s Your Code?

So I’ll leave you with this:

What’s your code?

Don’t overthink it.

Start with three.

Let them speak through your lived experience.

Let them find you in the quiet.

And then—live them out loud.